http://twloha.sitecrafting.com/blog/ Latest blog entries from TWLOHA en-us Fri, 20 Nov 2009 14:11:10 PST Fri, 20 Nov 2009 14:11:10 PST SiteCrafting, Inc. CMS http://www.twloha.com/blog/story-catchers/ Today was a beautiful day. Today I had the pleasure of having conversations that really matter. Sometimes I forget how blessed I am to be part of this movement—that not all organizations value stories to the point that they’ll allow for you to silence your phone, close your laptop and shut your mouth in the middle of a workday to listen and learn from another. I am thankful that in our office we are able to practice what we preach, to listen when needed, and share from the core of our being. This morning I got to hear about the passions of a witty Scottish fellow. Our friend Stuart is currently visiting us from Scotland and has big dreams to make our presence in the UK a greater reality, and to impact those who wouldn’t naturally cross paths with To Write Love on Her Arms. This afternoon I got to have lunch with my friend Justin. We smiled and laughed, and later shared some about hard realities as we sat behind office desks and wondered about the pain that comes with honesty and figuring out next steps. This evening I ended my workday chatting with an author I admire; I was sitting at a desk in Cocoa, FL and he behind one in Portland, OR. It's so rare to read an author's work and also be able to exchange words in real-time. His name is Brian Doyle and he has an art for capturing truth with simple beauty and honesty. Last week I decided to email Jamie one of my favorite pieces of his, “Two Hearts.” I did this because Jamie recently gave each of our interns a copy of Rob Bell’s newest book, Drops Like Stars, as they leave us for summer and return to their communities to continue living out our mission and movement at home. Rob’s website says, “It is the difficult and the unexpected, and maybe even the tragic, that opens us up and frees us to see things in new ways. Many of the most significant moments in our lives come not because it all went right but because it all fell apart. Suffering does that. It hurts, but it also creates.” Today was a day in believing in stories, in the idea that confession and passion and honesty and forgiveness matter so much, but that questions and pain are a part of this growth process as well, part of the process of creating something new within each of us. And sitting here now, I can’t help but wonder if any of those rich conversations I got to have today has a greater significance. Jamie and I wanted to share Brian’s story with you guys… So, take a few minutes to read it, enjoy it, and wrestle with it. Brian shares our belief that stories matter, and encouraged me over the phone that we should all strive to become better listeners and “story catchers” in our daily lives. We hope your day feels beautiful. Love. Kaitlyn --- Two Hearts By Brian Doyle 
from God is Love Some months ago my wife delivered twin sons one minute apart. The older is Joseph and the younger is Liam. Joseph is dark and Liam is light. Joseph is healthy and Liam is not. Joseph has a whole heart and Liam has half. This means that Liam will have two major surgeries before he is three years old. I have read many pamphlets about Liam's problem. I have watched many doctors' hands drawing red and blue lines on pieces of white paper. They are trying to show me why Liam's heart doesn't work properly. I watch the markers in the doctors' hands. Here comes red, there goes blue. The heart is a railroad station where the trains are switched to different tracks. A normal heart switches trains flawlessly tow billion times in a life; in an abnormal heart, like Liam's, the trains crash and the station crumbles to dust. So there are many nights now when I tuck Liam and his wheezing train station under my beard in the blue hours of night and think about his Maker. I would kill the god who sentence him to such awful pain, I would stab him in the heart like he stabbed my son, I would shove my fury in his face like a fist, but I know in my own broken heart that this same god made my magic boys, shaped their apple faces and coyote eyes, put joy in the eager suck of their mouths. So it is that my hands are not clenched in anger but clasped in confused and merry and bitter prayer. I talk to God more than I admit, "Why did you break my boy?" I ask. I gave you that boy, he says, and his lean brown brother, and the elfin daughter you love so. "But you wrote death on his heart," I say. I write death on all hearts, he says, just as I write life. This is where the conversation always ends and I am left holding the extraordinary awful perfect prayer of my second son, who snores like a seal, who might die tomorrow, who did not die today. (A happy update: Brian shared with me that Liam is alive and well today; he’s a healthy 14-year-old!) ... Fri, 21 Aug 2009 11:04:00 PDT http://www.twloha.com/blog/we-came-mary-1/ This past Saturday, I got to experience my very first Warped Tour! A few of us from the office and a couple interns travelled down to West Palm Beach to meet up with our Warped team so we could meet supporters and get a taste of life on the road. We ended up staying the night after we packed up that day, spending time with some of the other members of our team that night. Sunday we slept in, got to hang-out poolside at our hotel and eat ice cream (a very fun, girly get-away). While we were laying in the sun, Jamie’s younger sister Jessica rolled onto her side and began to tell Lindsay (our Intern Coordinator) and me the story of a woman named Mary. I was on the edge of my seat, drawn into this woman’s story with tears in my eyes and goosebumps all over my skin. You know those moments you hear a story of truth and love and know that it’s real and that it tells a greater story? That’s Mary’s story. Lindsay told Jess she needed to write about her experience, and Jess responded by laughing, saying, “Jamie’s the writer in this family, not me.” I told her that she absolutely needed to write it, and that I would help her with the tricky grammar stuff (which, wasn’t much). We all have stories to tell, and I knew that Jess’ story would resonate with each of you. So, enjoy. Love. Kaitlyn  --- There is a reason and purpose for every festival or event we do. Sometimes we know the reason in advance. Sometimes we have to do a little searching. Other times that reason finds us. Last Saturday was your typical summer afternoon in Florida, hot and muggy in the morning and a downpour in the afternoon. Music was blaring from the Kevin Says Stage not far from where we were set up. People embraced the rain and started dancing, or they ran for shelter under one of the tents nearby. As the rain started, a woman came up to our tent and asked what we did. Over the noise of the rain and the loud music, I leaned forward so she could hear me; I told her about all of the issues we were there to raise awareness about. Immediately her eyes filled with tears. Something I said hit home. Was it the word suicide? Was it the word depression? I walked around the table and immediately hugged her. I didn’t know what she had been through. All I knew is that she was the reason we were there. We came for Mary. Through her tears, she then told me her brother had committed suicide six weeks ago. In addition, her sister has been struggling with self-injury by burning herself. Since she had never heard of TWLOHA before, I asked her what made her approach our booth. She said that she read the top of our tent. She read the words, TO WRITE LOVE ON HER ARMS, and said all she knew is that she wanted that for her sister.  A funny sounding phrase for most made all the sense in the world to her. She asked where our name came from. She asked if Renee was still alive today, and the moment I told her “yes” gave her all the reason in the world to keep fighting for her sister. I heard her tell her friend that if Renee was okay then one day her sister could be okay too. I don’t think Mary came to Warped Tour thinking she’d find hope or a group of people already fighting the fight she’d been struggling with the last six weeks. I’m not really sure why she went. I know why we went though. We went for her. We went to give her hope through conversation, through resources, through information we had available. And we’ll continue to go to events for Mary, for people with a story all their own, for you. Your story matters. And you are loved in this moment. Jessica  : ) ... Wed, 29 Jul 2009 14:15:00 PDT http://www.twloha.com/blog/response-to-self-injury-on/ This is a response to the most recent episode of MTV’s Real World Cancun.   We were made aware of this particular episode through an email received earlier today. Members of our team watched last night’s Real World Cancun episode, in which Ayiiia self-injures after a season of arguments and a difficult living situation with her roommates. Since watching, we’ve read over the messages coming from MTV viewers, e-mails, and Twitter. It’s easy to watch a show and feel like you know a person, feel like your opinion about what’s going on in their world is easily solvable and can be fixed by simply “cheering up.” After I watched the episode online, I viewed a couple of the responses by other members of the show, and it was so clear to me that hurtful responses towards people struggling with self-injury are not ok, but sometimes, they’re the only way we know to respond. What the MTV producers did really well with this episode was bring to light the way we have a chance to respond during confusing, painful moments in the lives of those we do life with. I think that Chloe, one of our TWLOHA team members, said it best when she said that when faced with an issue they don’t understand, like self-injury, people can either antagonize, sympathize or become apathetic. Each of these responses was evidenced in the Real World episode. We want to say that we see the confusion. We see Ayiiia’s pain, and we see the frustration of her roommates who don’t understand why she chooses to respond by hurting herself. We understand the confusion these issues carry, and we want to say that striving to understand them is important. If you saw this episode and it was hard to watch, or triggering, we are sorry. If seeing Ayiiia in her place of pain reminded you of a place you’ve come from or a place you’re currently struggling with, we are sorry. However, in the same way it hurts us to see pain broadcasted into homes on TVs and computer screens, it cannot be denied that it forces the world to see the reality of these issues, that they exist, and that they happen. This is the real world we live in. Ayiiia later confessed in an interview that prior to the Real World she had only shared with two friends about her self-injury. Her vulnerability in sharing herself with every Real World viewer reminds us of the power our stories hold, and the role they play in breaking silence, entering dark places and helping us feel less alone.  We’ve been in touch with some friends over at MTV and we’re working to help in any way that we can. We want to be available in helping people find help and new resources in their moments of pain.  Love. Kaitlyn Oh—and on an exciting side note, Jamie just boarded a plane and is currently flying across the United States to California to attend the US Open of Surfing with a few other members of our team. This is a big moment for TWLOHA, and it’s a chance for us to connect in new ways with the surfing community, which many members of our team grew up in. ... Thu, 23 Jul 2009 20:19:00 PDT