im 14 and i frist wrote a suicide letter when i was 12. i feel like im not important anymore and theres so much going on at home right now.

1 | Left by Alyssa | Apr. 2, 2009 at 5:30pm

Alyssa- I am here to tell you that no matter what your story is you and your story are very important!!!
May peace come to you today and last the rest of your life!!!

2 | Left by Brittany | Apr. 3, 2009 at 3:02pm

Lots of love to you Alyssa.
Praying for you.

3 | Left by Victoria | Apr. 4, 2009 at 1:40pm

I got this book for Christmas, and already I've read the whole thing. Renee's life sounds just like how mine use to be.

Renee && TWLOHA are my hero!!!

4 | Left by melissa | Apr. 4, 2009 at 1:53pm

i love the book. it goes with me everywhere. when im down because of my mother i go and read that, and somehow it makes me feel that i dont have it that bad, that someone had it worse off then me. its an amazing book, my favorite i have ever owned.

5 | Left by sami | Apr. 7, 2009 at 7:05am

Im am also only 14 and already understand how it feels to just want to runaway from it all and die. I suffer from depression and have for a while and have a constant feeling of being alone. Not only do i suffer from this my dad is also depressed and bipolar and constantly on pills and I have to take care of him alone and I am sooo scared of being like him when i get older. I just always feel like everyone leaves me starting with my mom but my twin, best friend, Susie promised she wouldn't and i believe her without her i think i would be dead right now and i have tried to died before but it didnt work. I love what this site is doing because i am starting to get help and however else needs it needs to know about this organization
Thanks!!!!.... Kris

6 | Left by kris | Apr. 14, 2009 at 3:01pm

I have not gone through anything like the things that I read on here. And I really do find myself fortunate that I havent. But it just makes me really want to help somebody who has to go through such pain. I have cut myself. And done a lot more self destructing things. But I see that it was really pointless because the reason that I was doign it wasn't half as bad as what other people go through.

7 | Left by Barbara | Apr. 18, 2009 at 1:10pm

incredible book. read it in two days. =]
renee yohe is an inspiration..

8 | Left by ash | Apr. 22, 2009 at 7:42am

I haven't read the book YET, but i'm planning on reading it as soon as I can.
I read all these comments and i'm amazed by all that people have gone through, and the struggles they endure. I haven't had nearly as many bad things happen to me. And yet, I'm still seriously depressed. I used to cut, but I'm trying to stop. I'll pray for all of you and I hope that happiness will soon be coming your way :)

9 | Left by Nicole | Apr. 30, 2009 at 6:31pm

i'm 14 and i've been struggling with depression for 2 years now, most people dont understand what it feels like.but with this website people can understand

10 | Left by Shelbie | May. 3, 2009 at 4:28pm

at the ages of aout 11 or 12- 14, I was depressed, severly. This site explains it, I have gotten better since, and is now 16. I promis you all in the shadows there is healing and good treatment out there.

11 | Left by Kim | May. 7, 2009 at 1:39pm

I'm going to go get your book read it and see where it takes me. And if you can or find it in your time to respond to me I would like to ask you the purpose in writing a suicide note if your family doesn't care to read it, and if it will only make your family hate you more. I have nothing to say to my family so I would never write a suicide note they aren't worth my time but my life isn't worth much either so why does it matter whether I live or die.~Kellie~

12 | Left by Kellie | Nov. 12, 2009 at 7:45pm

i have tried to commit suicide twice in my life....all because the people that i most trusted died...the first time was when i was 13 and a person (a stranger) and he became my only friend, when i turned 14 his dad killed him...nothing was proven but i know he did.... i tried it again but stoped my self in time only because i knew that he would not like for me to do that......as time went on i found another friend, i loved him, he loved me...he asked me to marry him..i said yes....two months later he died in a motorcycle accident....
Im 17 and this happened 6 months ago...i been in constant battle with suicide thoughts...but this, TWLOHA gives me hope it gives me stregth....

thanks a lot! you have helped alot in my life

13 | Left by Abigail | Nov. 30, 2009 at 1:58pm

im 15, and the first time i tried to cut was when i was 9. it didnt really start till i was 14. i had just gone through alot and its easier for me to feel physical pain then emotional. at the time my best friend was doing it too. my parents found out, and all they did was ask me to stop and told my friends mom that she was doing it too. her mom didnt believe it though. i stopped for a couple months but then started back again. its like an addiction on bad thing and the blades against my skin. i have urges all the time, but ive recently stopped.. kinda. im going out with someone and promised but its hard, his parents know and it only makes our relationship worse. i havent cut in about 3 weeks. but found out last night that my bestfriend is still doing it. i say them.. going on the way up her arm.. cuts. but she doesnt care anymore, and wont listen to anyone. i want both of us to get help.. but im not sure how without ruining relationships.

14 | Left by Anon | Jan. 30, 2010 at 11:35am

I am really depressed and everything in my life is going wrong and I am almost ready to write a suicide letter and half of my friends are mad at me and my parents and the other half of my friends and the school counlser are worried about me and want to help but I won't let them. Than all my teachers and rest of my family members and everyone at my church are worried about me now and want to help me but I won't let them.

15 | Left by samantha victoria | Feb. 10, 2010 at 3:53pm

Samatha, sometimes life is so hard and so hopless, but please listen to this song. 'i belong' by Kathryn Scott. Nothing can separate you from his love.God has given you these people to help,trust them and let them help. You will make it. Romans 8:19

16 | Left by Rebecca | Feb. 11, 2010 at 12:54pm

I am 15 going on 16 and I have tried to kill my self twice already. The first time was when I was in 8th grade and nothing seemed to be going right. But after that failed I turned to a blade and started to cut when I was 12 and I've tried to stop multiple times and everytime when I actually feel good about myself and feel like I don't need to have my blade I go back to it. In the last month my heart has been broken and beaten, and I feel worthless and like I just cause people problems, I just can't find the light at the end of the tunnal. But I am in a teen group and that helps but i can never really open up in there because of my trust in people has gone down so low I get paranoide really easyly. But now I WANT TO GET BETTER to be normal as my parents put it, to have my freinds back and for them not to have to worry about me 24/7...But I don't know how...

17 | Left by Tianna | Mar. 2, 2010 at 6:45am

You and my favorite band in the world Between The Trees, helped me a lot for the past few years. In 2006My dad committed suicide and I got to doing self-harm, but now I'm 15 and I'm getting over the memories and flashbacks and I no longer done self-harm in a year now. Thank you so much for opening my eyes.
~Mandy~

18 | Left by Amanda | May. 20, 2010 at 6:06am

I love this site because it's real , and is about real problems that some people just cant see , hope to see you all @ Warp Tour

19 | Left by Jasmin :) | May. 26, 2010 at 1:08pm

I used to cut when i was 12/13, now three years later and after not cutting in those three years, I was wondering if you or anyone had any advice on how to deal with the scars left behind.

20 | Left by Terra | Jun. 27, 2010 at 11:20pm

Can I just say, reading these comments breaks my heart. I've been down and out, I've felt hopeless and depressed, I've thought there's just no more reason to live anymore...but then I remember ONE very Important part of my Life: JESUS CHRIST! It's crazy to think that a Man you can't see can take care of you, but I kid you not...whenever I needed someone, but didn't know what to do; whenever I was at the end of my rope, ready to give in, Jesus. Jesus was there, Fighting for and WITH me! He always will be...and the best part: HES THERE FOR YOU TOO! Cry out to God in your time of need. He is ALWAYS ready to rescue you! Always!

21 | Left by Sarah | Nov. 28, 2010 at 11:27pm

Im only 13. Some know me as "rodeo star" "emo" "diffrent" but I only see me. My mom left. Dad screams and hits. I'm depressed....suicidal... scared. I want so much more in life; but I cut. I drink. I try to forget. But you know, all that is meaningless. It really is. I realize now that one day I will have to face my fears whether I want to or not. Whether I'm ready or not... TWLOHA has helped to make me more equiped to face my past. My dad. Without these people, I would be too far gone by now.. thank you.

22 | Left by Trish | Dec. 21, 2010 at 8:31pm

I'm 17 and i lost my grandma in 2006 the day after christmas... it had been very hard for me and i was ok at first but now it has been getting worse. i never cut before. i started last year few times but now i have been doing it a lot but i don't cut myself because i want to die i just want the pain to go away and i have panic attacks and i don't know what to do anymore.. i feel like i'm losing everything and going out of control. i have told my friend about it and she doesn't like when i cut but i am just so mad and upset. i think i am depressed i don't know though. i have tried to talk to ppl at school and home but i can't. i feel like no one understands me and i'm all alone. my grandma was everything and it hurts much more she died after christmas. it was one of her favorite holidays. i feel guilty and regret... i feel like it was my fault but i know it wasn't, she was very sick.. idk anymore.

23 | Left by Megan | Jan. 2, 2011 at 7:36pm

I am excited to get this book and read it! I've been REALLY struggling with cutting since 8th grade all the way up to now even, and i wrote my first suicide note a few weeks ago, and almost went through with it, but because of the hope i now understand that i have in God I've been doing A LOT better!! God is SOOOO AMAZING!!!

24 | Left by Sadie | Jan. 29, 2011 at 10:59am

-Megan
All may seem hard right now. Trust me! I've been to rock bottom and back again and again. I too felt like i was loosing everything! I too felt guilt and regret! I too felt like no one understood! But, i guarantee i understand completely. I lost my closest friend ever in a car accident and he was everything to me! i thought the whole world was just ending. That's when my cutting got BAD! But with God's help, I am proud to say that i have been 7 days without cutting and i feel AMAZING! God is SOOO good!! :)

if you need someone to talk to my email is singer7_2012@hotmail.com

25 | Left by Sadie | Jan. 29, 2011 at 11:12am

I started cutting when I was 11,now I'm 15. I was clean for a few months then I started feeling depressed again. And I would harm myself because I hate everything about my apperence.and I still do..Let me just say Renee and TWLOHA are my heros! I don't know where I'd be without knowing about the organization and knowing her story.

26 | Left by Michelle | Jan. 31, 2011 at 8:54pm

I am going to be an extra in the "To Write Love on her Arms" movie! I live a few hours from the TWLOHA headquarters in FL., and they are filming a movie about her life here in a few weeks. I submitted my photos and info, and I got the part as an extra. I'm really excited about it, and I've been emailing the casting director back and forth over the last week. I never heard once of TWLOHA before this, and I looked it up and I can't beilive how famous it is! I actually had the words "Love is the Movement" on my myspace page, and I never knew what it meant, but this is what it's from. Her Story is so inspiring, and I actually struggle with these things. I'm 14 and I feel depressed and stuff a lot. Well, can't wait until filming starts, hopeully I can meet her!

27 | Left by Nikkie | Feb. 15, 2011 at 6:08pm

I am 14 years old. I have scars on my arms. I have had suicidal thoughts. I know I am not the only teenage girl that can say that. And that breaks my heart. Too many young girls go through this. And we shouldn't. There's a point when we just give up... But you just have to keep going. If Renee survived, so can we. Believe me. I'm sure all of us, including myself, have been through a crazy amount of tough times. But what doesn't kill us makes us stronger, right? this isn't a pity party, I'm here to tell anyone that there IS hope. I've hit rock bottom, I came to a point in my life where I was positive there was nothing to keep living for. But I was wrong. The courage and strength that God gave me saved my life. As I look down at my arm, I see the scars that send me into a tidal wave of depressing memories of the lowest point in my life. But as I see my scar covered arm, it also gives me hope, courage, and strength. Because I know that I got through that, so it gives me the strength to get through other tough times. I am not at all saying that my self injury was the right thing to do. I'm saying that through my mistakes I have become the stronger young woman I am today. And I encourage you all to do the same. Because from pain, comes beauty. Like Renee's book says; the purpose for the pain. I could go on forever, but I should probably be getting to the point. I just encourage you all to persevere through anything that you may be struggling with right now. Because, believe me, the rescue, healing, and recovery is worth it.

28 | Left by Vicky | Apr. 2, 2011 at 7:13pm

My name is Ana. I'm 18 years old.
I just wanted to let you guys know that you all aren't alone. I did experience some very low low low points in my life, but never turned to self harm, drugs, addiction, or anything like that. I have a little sister. She's my world. She's 13 years old.. very beautiful. Her name is Michelle. She has the most beautiful eyes & smile.. she brings me joy into my life.
She's currently going through a very hard time in her life. Cutting, depression, thinking about suicide.. I've tried my best to be by her side. & I continue to do so. She's seeking help. & I would do anything for her.
However, this isn't why I wrote this..., I just want you guys to know, you all are loved by someone... & I'm well aware depression is a very hard stage in your life.. you aren't alone. Renee is such an inspirational person. She's so beautiful & gives us all hope. Keep your head up high ladies.. everything will get better through time..

29 | Left by Ana | May. 5, 2011 at 11:18am

I want to read this book, and someday I will.
I've struggled with depression since I was 12... And, I'm now 18, almost 19. I've dealt with the suicide attempts, cutting, and meth addiction. I've been placed in behavioral units 3 times, and still haven't learned or understood everything. But, everyday, for every soul is a constant tug-of-war between relapse and recovery. I want to read this book, with wishes that it'll help me understand a little more.

30 | Left by SarahJae | May. 22, 2011 at 1:59pm

I want to read this book badly and I will.. In the past few years I've been struggling with depression and cutting.. I'm only 14. I thought about suicide, but I realized I had one life and I didn't want to cut it short, but still I sat in my room and cut. I had one person that I could talk to, my adopted 17-year old brother.. My mother feared we were getting to close (talking every day) so she made him move in with his friend, and told me I was never to talk to him again. I lost all trust in my mom, I would go days with out talking to her. I still miss my brother deeply, and it hurts to have no one to go to. But I always remember cutting only sums the pain, it doesn't make the memories or whatever your going through go away.. You have one live, love it, and live it to its fullest

31 | Left by Daisy | May. 28, 2011 at 5:57pm

Home is a place where everything is supposed to be "safe." The problem usually starts when you don't even have a place to call "home" and you start to wonder where you belong. You don't belong in school; no one understands you. At home, you are only yelled at for your mistakes. Nothing goes right, and nothing is fine. Things get worse, and you turn to cutting. It doesn't solve everything in the long run, but it temporarily saves you. You want to stop, but everyone is on you and screaming at you. It only leads you on. And that is where I'm at right now.

But it will all be okay one day, even if it is far off in the future. Hold on to hope; don't let go because it's all you'll have. Hold on to life; you'll need it so that you may come to smile one day. Know that you are loved and that God blessed you. Smile through the pain and maybe one day, that smile will be yours to keep. ~Gina~

32 | Left by Gina | May. 30, 2011 at 11:21am

Well, I have had issues in life with cutting and eating disorders, but wehen I found TWLOHA things started to take a turn for the better. I am on deprssion pills and haven't cut in almost half a year now. I still love to read about what is going on in the TWLOHA world. I am going to Warped Tour this summer and can't wait to visit the TWLOHA booth. This Movement saved my life! Thank you!

33 | Left by Rena Marie | Jun. 6, 2011 at 1:23pm

i'm 17.
when i was 15 i started dating and fell in love with Severe Manic Bipolar Disorder. my boyfriend was 18 and was diagnosed when he was 8.
he doesn't remember ever yelling at me and telling me i was worthless now. he would apologize then, but it's been two years and we consider each other big brother and little sister now. and he doesn't remember the bad. but he does protect me like a little sister. his new gf is an old friend of mine. we re-found each other through him. she is the jealous type though. and he is in love with her. and she doesn't want him to have a close relationship with me... i'm losing the person i trusted within seconds of meeting him.
while dating on-and-off for 9 months with him i cut my forearm, shoulder and leg. i didn't have a razor blade so i used nail clippers, nail scissors (now bloodstained and in my 1st bf's "box" with the rest of our stuff), and i purposely made my cat scratch me because then i could really say, "it was my cat." i burned my shoulder with matches. and i was anorexic for a month and a half to two months.
i started dating one of my best friends, Jake, on may 28, 2010 and we are still dating. we are doing really well. we all used to go out as a foursome. but heather got jealous. so we haven't all summer. i miss it. but i can't help it. everytime i ask if she wants to she is magically sick or has to work or already has plans... it's not fair.
my "big sis" lori is mad at me for something that i didn't do and is a misunderstanding. i lost all of my gf's. now im all alone with my guys and i'm losing my favorite one besides Jake... David (1st bf).
im all alone and not worth it. there have been so many times that i have wanted to go back there. but i'm not allowed to. i promised jake.
now i'm doing a benefit concert for TWLOHA bcuz i have no more gf's i get to plan it and do everything by myself and the advisor. so. yeah.
oh and did i forget that for those 9 months i had DID. Dissociative Identity Disorder. i'm a fiction author. i write in first person under the name Ebony. that's my characters name. she is in my head. always will be. but it was worst during those nine months. now she only comes back if life is too stressful.
i also have epilepsy and asthma.
...i feel a little better just typing all of that.

34 | Left by Emilie/Ebony | Jul. 29, 2011 at 10:25am

I am 14 and i am a girl and i feel like sharing some of my story I was in 6th grade when i first started to cut...My mom had heard from a girl at my school that i cut and i told her that a note book had slid down my arm and thats why i had a mark on my arm...as the years have went on my urgus to cut got out of control i thought i would be able to stop and i have but in the end i have always relapsed right now i am 4 days clean and the only reason i am not dead yet is beacause my boyfriend has talked me out of it if it wasn't for him i prob wouldn't be alive or i would be in a place i would not want to be prob doing drugs and much more...I have tried to reach out and tell my mom what i have done but i am afriad that she wouldn't exept me as it is she alredy hates me and i think this would just push her over the edg...Thanks for reading this..and i will try to stay clean for as long as possible

35 | Left by The Emo Kid | Oct. 7, 2011 at 1:55pm

Well honestly I don't believe there is a purpose for me to be alive. I have been through so much in my life that I am never ever happy, and I don't think I ever will be. It's not always easy to talk to my friends about these things, and I just can never do it. I've wanted to kill myself for sometime now, and I feel like I'm getting closer and closer everyday. I just don't want to live anymore. I feel so lonely. My friends just don't understand. I know they care, but sometimes that just doesn't save a person from themselves. On my left arm I have many scars, way over 100. And some new scars are healing as I write this. They ached all day, they're still pretty new, not even 24 hours old. And I'm already thinking where I could make new ones. I love how they look. My cuts are the only thing in my life that I have control over. I know I should get some help, but I don't want to get help. I feel like I'm already in too deep and there is no way getting out. So maybe it's just too late for me.

Thank you for reading this. I appreciate it. -Gabby

36 | Left by Gabby | Oct. 7, 2011 at 2:51pm

I just don't know anymore.
I constantly feel as if I'm going to break down. I shake for no apparent reasons and I've started with self-injury again. I'm not sure what to do. My parents alienate me, and they don't even know me. They don't even know the real me. And I'm required by my household's atmospheric presence to put on a mask that hides who I really am and suffocates me inside. I'm cold, all the time. Cold on the inside. It feels as if I've been opened and have had everything scooped out. As if I'm alone. Which I am here. Nobody really knows how I do feel. Except for two people, my two best friends, Kierra and Lauren. But we only see each other at school. And now I only have one class with each of them. I'm reaching out to more people, people who ask about who I am, how I am, and other things like that, and when I do try to actually tell others what's going on, it feels wrong, and they just tune me out. I'm not sure what I can do, I'm not sure how to do it. And I need help. So now I'm asking you guys...

37 | Left by Nick | Dec. 26, 2011 at 8:02pm

Nick, I'm sorry. Though I don't really know you, I wish the best of luck for you. I understand how you feel. I recently moved to a new state and I've lost all my friends; it's like starting life all over again, with nothing, only emptiness. Hold on to the two friends that you do have and find comfort in them, even if you don't see them often. Try to realize that you're not alone. Also, the majority of people WILL tune you out because they don't understand how you feel, because they haven't been through what you're feeling. Try to understand and find someone who you can talk to. I know it's hard, and I'm still trying to find someone after a year of searching, but try to be hopeful and hang in there.

38 | Left by Gina | Dec. 29, 2011 at 5:15pm