To Write Love on Her Arms

The Lady in 19F.

Jul. 15, 2010 at 10:40am

While working with To Write Love on Her Arms I’ve heard some amazing stories. I’ve listened, I’ve shared, and I’ve grown. We say it all the time, “your story is important,” because it is. Your story is one that was written with purpose. It’s still being written. Sometimes we suffer. Sometimes we stumble, we fall, and we can’t see how we can possibly get up. Our hearts break, our world seems to get darker, we feel alone. But through those struggles you learn and you grow. You figure out who you are. Two weeks ago I met an amazing woman on a plane to Cincinnati that helped me see that again.

I woke up at 5am. My alarm went off and I began to slowly get dressed, mumbling under my breath about staying up late and needing more sleep. Whitney, Narika and I were heading to a festival in Pennsylvania and were in for a long day. Airport security lines stretched out into the atrium, children were crying, a whole family even jumped ahead of a line of people who had been waiting for awhile (us included). A crowded tram ride, a long walk to the terminal, and a quick breakfast later I was situated in my seat on the plane.

Because my ticket had been booked after Whitney’s and Narika’s my seat was a few rows ahead of them. I settled into seat 19E, a center seat between a mother of two spunky girls across the aisle and a woman about my mother’s age with a warm smile and a People magazine beside the window, seat 19F.

“You’ve got to let me know if that’s a good read,” I said with a smile, pointing at the front cover of the magazine. “I couldn’t decide if I wanted it or not.” She laughed and offered to let me have it once the flight was over. She wouldn’t need it for her connecting flight because she was certain she’d finish before this flight was through. We chatted for a moment and I learned she was on her way to Montreal to see her mother, though she was living in Florida just down the coast from my sleepy little town of Cocoa.

The plane began to rumble down the runway and I popped in my headphones and attempted to catch a few moments of rest before the long day ahead of me officially began.

The chime signaling that it was time to turn off portable electronic devices pulled me from my drowsy daze. The lady beside me was tapping her arm to the beat of the music in her own headphones as she flipped through her magazine. As I began to put away my iPod she began to do the same.

“So,” she said, almost hesitantly, looking for a conversation, but unsure of my willingness to participate, “why are you going to Cincinnati?” I began to explain to her about To Write Love on Her Arms and our participation in the festival. Her eyes got wide as I talked about the need for conversations to start and for people to know they are not alone, that their stories are important. She told me that she works in education and feels like so many of her students struggle with the same issues I had just mentioned.

“It’s so important,” she said. “I’m glad to have grown up in the 60’s! It was a lot less stressful, though my husband may not agree.” Seeing my confusion she began to tell me about how her husband and his five best friends enlisted in the army together straight out of high school and were deployed to Vietnam. She didn’t say how long it took, but within weeks of each other, each of her husband’s best friends were killed in the war. He was even shot down in a helicopter. “He lives with so much guilt and sadness. He doesn’t understand why he lived and they didn’t!” You could see how much she loved her husband as she spoke about him. Her eyes hurt for him, yet she smiled.

“He’s had a good life! He lived! We got married young. We had three children.” My frustrations from the morning seemed to disappear as I listened to this woman weave her story for me. “I know we’re meant for so much, especially after 9/11. I was in the first tower, you know.”

She went on to tell me about her morning on September 11, 2001, a morning where she decided to leave her desk on the 91st floor because she was hungry. She chatted with co-workers as she made her way to the elevator and ultimately ended up in the concourse below the streets of New York buying breakfast. It was then that the first plane hit, shaking the walls of the tower and causing a great commotion. The plane crashed into the building killing everyone on board as well as many of this woman’s co-workers, the co-workers she had just wished a good morning to. The fear and panic consumed the building and she quickly escaped and watched from six blocks away as the tower fell.

2,995 people died in the attacks on America on September 11, 2001.

2,995 people were lost, their families left behind, their stories ended too soon.

She looked at me with a concrete assurance, “I’m not afraid of anything anymore. I don’t care about death. I faced death. My husband faced death. We’re alive and now it’s about living life and being happy.” Her words seemed to be like cold water rushing through my body. Goosebumps filled my arms and tears came to my eyes. This woman. This beautiful stranger sat beside me with a rare confidence about life. She shouldn’t be alive, but she is. She is! Her heart is beating and her lungs are breathing fresh air and she is alive! She began to describe how she doesn’t take for granted the little things anymore, “a small child’s giggle, a sunrise on the beach, spending time driving around and experiencing new things. Those are the moments you cherish no matter how small.”

I didn’t know that getting onto that plane would change me. I didn’t know that the smiling woman reading a magazine would create a new sense of hope in my life. She revealed truths to me that I had forgotten, truths that rejuvenated me and gave me peace. She had lived, struggled, felt pain and fear. But through those struggles, through that pain, she was given hope. Switchfoot says that every breath is a second chance. This woman embraced that truth. She ran with it. As I got off the plane with her I thanked her for sharing her story with me. I let her know how much it touched me. She just smiled and told me to have a good trip to Pennsylvania and then she was gone, lost in a sea of travelers looking for their connecting flights.To the lady in 19F – thank you so much for sharing your life with me. Thank you for reminding me to embrace life and live. Your story is so important and meaningful.

By: Holly Hallum

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A special note about Holly:

Holly was an intern here with us this past fall. After her internship, she stayed on with us part-time, helping Denny run the UChapters program, working as the Intern RA and investing herself as a member of our community here in Cocoa. We’re excited to share that as of yesterday, Holly joined our team full-time.

Let her know how much her words mean to you, and join us in celebrating her today!

Posted in General by Kaitlyn Suveg

Comments (22)

Wow. This is incredibly moving. Thank you for sharing this beautiful woman's story with the world. God bless.

1 | Left by Gia | Jul. 15, 2010 at 10:52am

An amazing story-brought tears to my eyes. Thanks for reminding us how important life is, how we should cherish every moment and every person in our lives.

2 | Left by Meg | Jul. 15, 2010 at 11:11am

Congratulations, Holly!!! Your words were meant to reach people, and it seems you've found your venue. I'm proud of you and happy for you!!

3 | Left by Crystal | Jul. 15, 2010 at 11:30am

Thank you for your story...its always seems to me that on a busy morning with chaos God can give us a reminder of what we have and how fortunate we are...im sure you will be a blessing to TWLOHA...that must have been such a moment tio hear those words from that woman

Thanks again

Jer

4 | Left by Jer | Jul. 15, 2010 at 12:15pm

First congrats on being promoted to full time Holly. Most importantly though is how this story felt so familar to me. Last year coming home from Arizona on my connecting flight into Salt City I met a woman, a mormon that talked with me during our flight and shared the story of her life with me and then myself with her. Not only does it pass the time but it may me realize each person, every person has their own story to tell. Whether its happy, sad or both each person deserves to have their story told. Thank you so much for all that you and the rest of the TWLOHA crew do. You've helped me through the death of a friend caused by suicide and continue to give my inspiration each day I live :) Changing lives day after day.

5 | Left by Janessa | Jul. 15, 2010 at 12:26pm

Wow this is amazing thank you so much for sharing this with us. This gave me goose bumps. Amazing story!

6 | Left by Keada | Jul. 15, 2010 at 3:39pm

That is incredible. It is amazing to me, how many stories are in airports... if we are just willing to listen.

Thank you for sharing her story, and your words. Congratulations on joining the TWLOHA team, Holly! :-) You rock.

7 | Left by Mary | Jul. 16, 2010 at 8:48am

Thank you for sharing this story, it made me cry, but it was a good kind of cry. It made me think about the personal challenges I faced and the choice I made to carry on with my life. Thanks!

8 | Left by Jenna | Jul. 16, 2010 at 10:10am

Wow, this is certainly touching!

9 | Left by Karen-Maeby | Jul. 16, 2010 at 11:40am

Wow Holly! That was so moving! I can totally see why you are part of the TWLOHA team! I aspire to be like you and the rest, even if I don't make it as far as getting to the team I aspire to help people like you and to turn people on to TWLOHA to let them know their stories are important. I'm glad you got to have that special moment, and especially glad you decided to share it with us. :)

10 | Left by Kayla | Jul. 16, 2010 at 6:19pm

I finally was able to read this and am glad I did. I read it twice, and it brought tears each time. A beautiful thing. Every time I hear a story its like my heart opens a little more<3

11 | Left by Shayne | Jul. 16, 2010 at 9:32pm

Thank you for sharing this- it was really beautiful. I am from a small town in NJ where a large portion of people commute into NYC for work, and while many were lucky (the train from my town to NYC that many people took was late that day, meaning many people who would've been in the towers weren't- talk about lucky), some weren't; my brother's friend lost his father that day. Everyone's story is important, and thank you for sharing this one because hopefully it will help others realize that they are not alone.

12 | Left by Molly | Jul. 16, 2010 at 10:15pm

This is a beautiful story, thank you for sharing.

Also, congratulations Holly. Your words are beautiful.

13 | Left by Kendra | Jul. 18, 2010 at 10:01am

Hey Holly,

Curious, was that festival the one June 30th-July 3rd? It was really nice meeting you, Whitney, and Narika. I especially enjoyed talking and connecting with you. I'm glad you are passionately living and helping those in need. I'm happy to hear of your full time employment with TWLOHA.

More awareness is needed in the battle against the darkness. I found TWLOHA a little while ago and it helped me realize how many people still struggle with self injury, thoughts of suicide, depression, addictions, etc.

I would consider myself to be on the winning side victorious having struggled with some of these things in the past. We talked about much of this in person and some part of my heart was touched then. I hope TWLOHA considers you a valuable team member, because you are. At least I think so. I would welcome you as friend anytime. If I never physically meet you again, then I hope to see ya in eternity.

In short, thank you for going to that festival. Thank you for sharing this story. It is heart warming and inspiring.

14 | Left by Jonathan B | Jul. 18, 2010 at 7:59pm

This is the most inspiring thing I've read in forever. Great to get a fresh perspective...and so cool that the 'DNA' of twloha is so deeply engrained that it comes out in those momentary conversations of twloha's volunteers, interns, and staff.

15 | Left by bigjohnscott | Jul. 18, 2010 at 8:38pm

This story reading through it gave me shivers, and goosebumps.
it is moving and powerful.

16 | Left by Chelsea | Jul. 20, 2010 at 2:33pm

brilliant piece holly! made me cry, so touching and truthful- i think it applies to many of us, we are so engorged by pathetic daily dramas , that we dont use the time we have to appreciate whats important in life enough.

17 | Left by Lara | Jul. 21, 2010 at 4:38pm

Hey Holly! This is such an amazing story and you're so lucky to have met the lady in 19F, this story gave me goosebumps, its truely a touching story...thank you so much for sharing it :)

18 | Left by meers | Jul. 22, 2010 at 7:48am

Truly truly amazing... My breath catches in my chest and goosebumps rise on my arms... Wow to have the Vietnam side and then her story on 9/11. You're right she is ALIVE, her heart is beating and air filling her lungs... Thank you to woman in 19F for her story and willingness to share. Thank you so much for sharing this and welcome to the team...

19 | Left by Sky | Aug. 1, 2010 at 7:59pm

I feel so thankful that I've had the opportunity to read such a beautiful story that Holly has chosen to share with the world.

Thank you Holly.
I'm smiling through the tears!

20 | Left by April | Aug. 30, 2010 at 2:35pm

Thank you, Holly. I am going to share this story with my middle school students.

21 | Left by Ande | Sep. 7, 2010 at 9:56pm

im sitting in my room listening to give me anything by thr maine. a happy song. yet im crying by the impact this womans word had on me. i dont know what it was but something about this blog made me want to think about my life. im bulemic. have been for about two weeks. it wasnt something i planned. trust me. if there were more people like her and twloha in new jersey. maybe i would feek better about myself and i wouldnt have ever started it or even think about it. thank u

22 | Left by dina | Sep. 8, 2010 at 4:20pm

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