To Write Love on Her Arms

A chance to go abroad.

Mar. 1, 2011 at 1:41pm

Chloe reflects on her time in Europe.

I’ve always heard that an international trip requires months and months of planning. There are cell phone plans to be changed, key foreign words to learn, and travel adapters to be bought. From what I understand, usually everything is very calculated and mapped out, but if there is anything I’ve learned during my two and half years with TWLOHA, it’s that things don’t always happen the “usual way.” What was supposed to be a five-day vacation in Europe to visit my friend turned into a really incredible opportunity for us as an organization. We were invited to join Crown Jewel Defense on tour in Europe where they would be opening for Young Guns and All Time Low. We were asked to come along on their first ever tour because they believe in what we are doing, and want to help spread the message of TWLOHA.

After several emails and phone calls, my plane ticket was changed and I had to be ready to fly to London in twenty-two very short hours. The tour would start in Brussels in Belgium, then continue on to Amsterdam in the Netherlands, Hamburg and Berlin in Germany and end in Vienna, Austria. I had never been to Europe and I couldn’t believe I’d have the opportunity to experience so many different cities on my first trip there. But, as exciting as that was, it wasn’t why I wanted to go. A lot of people think going on tour means you get to “see” a lot of the places you are. But it’s actually quite the opposite. For the most part, you see the venue and the city within a two-block radius before you head to the next show the following day. So while I knew it would be neat I would be able to say I had been to each of those cities, my reason for going was much greater and had to do with people. I decided to go because of you guys.

Every day we receive emails and messages from people asking us to come to their town. And despite not being able to go everywhere we want to, our hearts are still in the small towns of Nebraska and the Russian tundra. So my purpose for going was the opportunity to meet our European supporters face-to-face. I couldn’t wait to put faces to the comments, messages and tweets from people in these far-away cities who frequently ask us to bring TWLOHA across the Atlantic. I wanted to hear their stories, hearts, answer questions and open up a dialogue. Given the short notice I was worried people wouldn’t be able to join us for informal meet and greets in each city. But I should have known better. Within minutes there was an abundance of emails from people asking for details and how long we’d be there.

I didn’t know how similar, and yet different Europe would be from the United States. I was shocked that nearly everyone I encountered spoke English in addition to the standard language of spoken in their country. I felt understood, and could communicate with people, which is important when you’re in an unfamiliar place. One of the first supporters I met asked me, “Do people look different here?” And the answer is no. The biggest difference I noticed and felt was how relaxed everyone seemed.

Europeans seem to embrace the calm. You can sit in a café for hours and never be interrupted by the server. Time doesn’t seem to be of great importance. I was never rushed, or hurried by anyone. As someone who is glued to my BlackBerry, not having a phone was a foreign experience for me. When I went to my first coffee shop I was confused and at first frustrated why the waiter didn’t practically demand my order a few moments after sitting down, or bring me the check after my first few sips of coffee. In recent years I’ve noticed America seems to be more worried about quantity instead of quality. I didn’t find that to be true in Europe.

During each meet and greet I was able to fully engage in conversation with each of the supporters that joined me because they weren’t in a rush either. Everyone around me was focused on the present, and living in the moment, instead of worrying about what they had to do in the next few hours, days and weeks. A very basic concept I didn’t realize I myself had gotten so far away from prior to this trip. And to be honest, something I’ve practically abandoned all together. Something I wasn’t aware I was missing.

The entire trip was such an amazing experience because of the people I was fortunate enough to meet. I sat with four girls at a café in Amsterdam and we laughed about the simple things in life. I had a heavy conversation with two girls in Hamburg, one of which had lost their father to suicide four years ago. In Berlin six of us sat in a café hiding from the cold and talked about ways to bring awareness to mental health issues in Europe. Being established with offices internationally is something we dream of doing, and something we aspire to have one day. Something I hope to be a part of because now that I’ve met so many of our international supporters and I’ve seen the places those messages come from it is not something I can easily let go of or forget about.

Europe, you are wonderful. I miss your beautiful cities, amazing coffee, the new friends we made and everyone I was fortunate enough to meet. I hope all of our international supporters know how much you mean to us, and that we hope we see more of you very, very soon.

With love,
Chloe

Posted in General, Journal, Music by Chloe Grabanski

Comments (15)

It was so nice to have met you Chloe! And really awesome that you travelled all the way to Europe conversate and spend time with people! That's not just saying people matter, but showing it too ;-)

Much Love.

1 | Left by Amy | Mar. 1, 2011 at 2:49pm

Hey Chloe! im glad you had fun in europe! its a place i have dreamed of visiting!hey, you mentioned wanting to spread TWLOHA, internationally? well how about nationally, as well? I want to start a movement to bring To Write Love On Her Arms to highschools across the country, as well as colleges. or maybe a group of highschool members to send across the country, if the college-aged people, people like Jamie Tworkowski or any others, doesnt want to do it!...I feel very strongly that depression starts in high school for many people, i know it did for me and a few really dear friends of mine! and id like to see my movement happen, or at least have TWLOHA to at least visit a couple big-ticket-depression hit schools/states, a couple times a year? thats not too much to ask, is it?

2 | Left by Lorena Terry | Mar. 1, 2011 at 5:13pm

Lorena, I agree. As important as spreading awareness to adults is I think it really does start in high school. It would be amazing to see twloha do some high school work.

3 | Left by Liska | Mar. 2, 2011 at 1:49pm

when i read this, i want to cry.
i didn't had the money to see you in hamburg and i was down like the whole day, even my teachers noticed that and when i tried to explain it to them, they didn't understand - but i guess that's because they don't know about my past.
anyways, whenever you will be back in europe - especially in hamburg - i will be there. (that's a promise!)

4 | Left by steffi | Mar. 3, 2011 at 10:59am

I hope you will be able to visit Sweden someday too, so I can go!

5 | Left by Nanna | Mar. 4, 2011 at 7:33am

did that Europe you experienced included Paris, France ? or will this place be included in another journey of this kind ?

By the way, another proof that Europe and the States still are linked each others... :) and THIS is awesome

6 | Left by Cecile Maalaki | Mar. 5, 2011 at 7:12am

I'm glad you enjoyed Europe. I hope you can visit England sometime, I know so many people who support TWLOHA. I also hope that the merchandise could become available for people from other countries to buy apart from America. I have been searching all over for a t-shirt and a bracelet!
Much love
Shannon x

7 | Left by Shannon Brogan | Mar. 6, 2011 at 1:19pm

I hope your next journey will include Newcastle :) quite the best place in England and I know a lot of people support TWLOHA here.
Love :)
Nina

8 | Left by Nina Hodgson | Mar. 7, 2011 at 1:28pm

I think it is really amazing that you took the opportunity from Crown Jewel Defense who opened for Young Guns and All Time low. You are always selfless and even though you were going on a fun trip to see you friends you took the chance to spread the word and to visit TWLOHA supporters. I grew up in Germany myself and know what you mean about Europe being completely different from the U.S. People are so much calmer there and don't care about time as much. They take life very calmly without any headaches and that's a really good way to live. You never feel rushed in restaurants or cafe's you really can just sit down for hours and enjoy your day. I think expanding internationally was a very good decision and like others have said starting to talk to younger students like middle and high schoolers who are going through the most change of their life, could be very exciting. Suicide prevention is very important and should be addressed as much as possible.

9 | Left by Catherine Jerez | Mar. 9, 2011 at 2:01pm

I live in Germany, just 1-2 hours away from hamburg. I'm so worried about missing the oppurnity to meet you there because I didn't noticed that you were going to visit germany. I hope you will come back here, mabe even to hanover (that's were I live), because me and my friends were really glad to see you, also I know a lot of your supporters here who were really glad to see you. It's so important to spread the word in the whole world!

10 | Left by Clara | Mar. 11, 2011 at 6:01am

Hey im hannah im 13 but my cousin works here i was wondering do u think i could work here to its just alot of my friends cut themself. i even tried it. i have stopped since then but if theres any way i could possibly help i would love it. please consider
Love,Hannah

11 | Left by Hannah | Mar. 11, 2011 at 7:34am

if theres any way plz email me HannahTheBlondie@yahoo.com

12 | Left by Hannah | Mar. 11, 2011 at 7:52am

I hope your next trip will bring you to Norway!

There are many people here who would benefit from the message TWOLHA sends to people who are hurting...

With

13 | Left by Anon | Mar. 16, 2011 at 9:03am

I think bringing TWLOHA to Middle Schools would be a great idea! Depression starts young, and I know a lot of people who would be happy to have someone to talk to about it or an assembly. A lot of kids are unaware of how to treat depression and a lot of lives are lost due to this. I know a lot if friends, including myself, who have had depressive feelings and I think TWLOHA at our school could benefit a lot of us.
With love & hope,
Emma

14 | Left by Emma | Mar. 20, 2011 at 8:45pm

I think it would help alot to start at middle schools and highschools. I no lot of people who cut or have eating disabilitys, and they just cant stop. Alot of teens and younge adults have problems and I think it would be great to get to them and help them sooner than later.

15 | Left by Em | Apr. 24, 2011 at 6:34pm

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